On the eve of the election I have been surprised by many things but one of the most surprising is how everyone on the internet seems to be writing a political post on their personal blogs. Seriously, I read two* this morning alone. Posts from people that don’t work for news organizations and write mostly about the novels they are in the middle of or their cats.
This got me thinking – OMG am I supposed to be writing my own political statement here at Sticky Jam Hands? It hardly seems the right platform but ALL. THIS. PEER. PREASSURE!
A girl can only take so much – but because I know I’m not going to change anyone’s mind about anything and we are so super emotionally charged about all of this and because it has basically ruined TV and Radio for the past nine months I’m going to use this opportunity to list a few things that would be worse to endure for three quarters of a year than political elections. This way I can check the box next to –Political blogging and you can all breathe a sigh of relief that we aren’t dealing with these things instead.
In no particular order, my list of 9 things worse than the election:
- Stabbing myself in the eye (for nine months)
- Battling a yeast infection (for nine months)
- Watching Gilbert Godfry talking (for nine months)
- Having that dream where all of your teeth fall out (repeatedly for nine months)
- Attempting to call an IT support line to explain a problem you only just barely understand (for nine months)
- Trying to fill out a home mortgage request application (for nine months)
- Contracting a horrible flesh eating disease (every day for nine months)
- Being hungover on an airplane (for nine months)
- Child Birth (for nine months)
Feel free to add your own list item in the comments below. Happy voting everyone!
*Clearly an accurate representation of the internet as a whole