Every time our dog Guinness feels like he isn’t getting enough attention he fakes injuries. I know… I know, but hear me out. The first time it happened was when our 18-year-old cat hurt her shoulder and she limped around the house for a few days until we decided to take her to the vet. Not being pleased to travel she spent her time at the vets blinding two assistants and setting fire to the exam room. On the way home she peed on me and ripped the shirt I was wearing entirely in two – I decided that she must be feeling better. When we got home from the cat vet Guinness (unaware of the anxiety riddled visit) started limping… and I could just see the little wheels in his doggie brain spinning:

“Wow, Ruka gets an awful lot of attention when she’s hurt, she even gets to ride in the car!”

He limped for a day or two and then we made him an appointment as well, in his excitement to get to go for a car ride he forgot he was supposed to be limping and bounded into the back seat, ran into the vets office and after a thorough check up was pronounced completely healthy.

Last night while Jason was packing to leave on his trip Guinness started limping again, looking dejected and following him around the house…

“ouch my paw… you can’t go anywhere it hurts so bad”

We examined his paw and there was nothing wrong with it. And then as soon as Jason was out the door this morning he looked at me, as if resigned, and started walking normally again.

Any of you who have ever met Guinness and knows he really is just a pretty face are probably stunned by his cunning, I know I am.

Call it anthropomorphizing  if you want but I think some day we might all being praying to his statue.